Don’t Fear the Reaper (#378)

My Chinese American husband has all kinds of hot sauce. There’s Cholula (his go-to for all things Mexican), siracha, Chinese chili oil (4 jars), Frank’s red hot sauce (for buffalo wings), gochuchang (Korean hot paste), sambal oelek (Indonesian chili paste?), and even jalapeno olive oil. He grows his own serrano peppers, which I once made the mistake of chopping and seeding without latex gloves. The skin under my fingernails burned for an entire day—despite soaking them in milk.

If it’s white people food with the inevitable weak sauce, Andy adds hot sauce.

Sometimes he overdoes the heat. Back when we were just dance partners, he made spicy Thai tofu curry. The man told me not to eat it, because “it’s too spicy, even for me.” I was appalled that Andy would let home-cooked food go to waste. I gobbled it up and declared it the greatest meal ever, with tears and snot running down my bright red face.

I was not raised on spicy food—not unless you think Hormel chili spicy. I didn’t do spicy until I moved to California. (Back then, “spicy” meant Del Taco’s spicy jack quesadilla.)

I learned more about heat when Andy watched the “Chili Eating” episode of We Are the Champions. It’s a half-fascinating, half-horrifying story about competitive eating involving the Carolina Reaper chili and its Scoville heat scale of 2 million plus (a jalapeño pepper is about 2,500).

Andy wondered what that tasted like. But not quite enough to actually order a pepper that has to be handled like a toxin.

My friend JM also loves spicy food. Whenever we go out for Indian food, she orders the highest spice level. The staff then side-eyes the shit out of her because JM is even whiter than me. I tell them, “I’ll give you ten dollars if you can make her cry.”

Nobody has made her cry yet.

JM was thrilled when a Dave’s Hot Chicken opened up nearby. They specialize in spicy. In fact, they even make you sign a waiver if you order their “Reaper chicken,” which is coated with a rub made from the Carolina Reaper pepper.

JM brought the Reaper chicken home and convinced her super white husband to try it. He took one bite, drank all the milk in the house, and has yet to forgive her for “the unpleasantness.” And JM? She turned on the kitchen faucet and let the water run over her tongue for a very long time.

Dave’s Hot Chicken has a menu option called “Chicken Roulette.” They give you 4 mildly spicy chicken tenders, 5 medium spicy chicken tenders, and 1 Carolina Reaper tender. They don’t tell you which one is which.

I got Chicken Roulette take out for Andy’s birthday meal. (Dinner AND a potential show!) Andy was game. He dumped three tenders on his plate. I carefully sniffed and examined all the tenders. They all smelled the same. I cut a piece off of three different tenders. Our son Dalton did the same, then poured himself 2 glasses of water and a giant mug of milk. He shrugged off our laughter and lectured us: “It’s better to prepare for the worst.”

Andy reported that his tenders were spicy, but not too spicy.

Dalton chowed down. His milk remained untouched. He returned for seconds before I had eaten two bites.

My first two tenders were medium spicy. The third tender? A definite burning sensation. I offered the rest of that piece to Andy. “Tell me what you think of this.”

Andy eyed me warily. But since I wasn’t sweating or teary-eyed, he stuffed the entire piece in his mouth. He chewed, and then said, “OH MY GOD.”

Beads of sweat broke out on his forehead as he gulped water. Andy then hurried to the refrigerator…only to discover that Dalton had poured the last of the milk. Dalton laughed evilly as Andy ran to the garage fridge for a new carton.

Sweat was pouring down Andy’s face when he returned. He tried in vain to mop it up with his hoodie. Dalton laughed harder and then asked me, “Hey, which tender was that?”

“I have no idea,” I responded. And then laughed at Dalton’s horrified face. My mouth still burned. I ate dill pickle slices as Dalton sniffed at the tenders. He insisted that he could tell which one was the Reaper and cut off bits of other tenders to try.

I scoffed at him. “If I can’t tell by smell, there’s no way you can.”

“MY olfactory cells are young and strong, mother,” Dalton replied. He took a bite, chewed for two seconds, coughed, and then downed his entire mug of milk.

I laughed until Andy dumped two more pieces of chicken on my plate. “Try these, honey.”

The first one was a little spicy. The second one… “It’s BITTER,” I declared. “It’s not just hot, it’s BITTER. Ick. So that’s got to be the Reaper, then. Which one was it?” I ate a French fry.

Andy looked at the pile of nearly identical tenders. “Uh…I don’t remember?”

Readers, if you decide to play chicken roulette, plan ahead. Use paper plates or toothpicks and number each tender, then keep track of which one you ate.

Unless, like us, you want to play multiple games of chicken roulette. Andy and Dalton were so traumatized that they were ready to toss out perfectly good food rather than risk the Reaper a second time.

Just like with Andy’s overly spicy Thai tofu, there was NO WAY I was letting good food go to waste. I cut off and tested a small bite of each remaining chicken tender. Those tenders were consigned to either a “mild” Tupperware container or a “medium” Tupperware.

I got lucky during this process of elimination. The Reaper wound up being the last tender. Dalton suggested I try it, “just to be sure.”

Ha, ha, no. Not after my mouth had finally cooled off (with much less milk or drama than the two males in the house).

Dalton used tongs to put the remaining piece of Reaper chicken in a separate container, adding one piece of mild chicken and one piece of medium chicken.

He plans on offering a “mild, medium, and spicy” chicken sampler to an unsuspecting friend.

God help him.

Our Own Grave (#377)

Well, fuck.

I specifically did not write a post before the election about how Harris would win because I didn’t want to jinx it like I did in 2016. Instead, I donated money, wrote letters to voters in swing states, and smugly watched Republicans panic.

I flew a “Harris-Walz” flag and put up a yard sign:

My dad, my friend JM, and even Brilliant Blonde Lawyer Sister were not so sanguine about a Democratic victory. Not even when I extolled the virtues of the Dem’s ground game, the problem with polling Gen Z and Millennials, and the fact that surely America had figured out that TRUMP IS A DODDERING IDIOT AND CONVICTED FELON WHO KILLED HUNDREDS OF THOUSANDS OF AMERICANS WITH A BOTCHED COVID RESPONSE AND THEN ATTEMPTED A COUP.

Sorry, fam. I will never underestimate the stupidity of my fellow white Americans again.

More than one of my social media friends in Europe asked me, “How the hell could this happen?”

The mathematical answer? Based on the projected final vote count, approximately 6 million fewer people voted for Harris than voted for Biden in 2020, while about 2 million MORE people voted for Trump this time around. (Harris will probably get 9-10 million more than Hillary Clinton did in 2016, in case you are wondering.)  The loss of blue voters isn’t due to a declining population, either. The United States has added approximately 6 million eligible voters to the rolls since 2020.

So at least 8 million people couldn’t bring themselves to vote for a Black woman. There’s a word for that: misogynoir.

And 6 million people went from, “Biden’s old, but Trump must be stopped” to “The options are a treasonous, convicted felon rapist or a Black woman? I can’t vote for either. Oh, well.”

As for the 76 million people who  actually vote for Trump? Originally I wrote a long historical explanation for this post. It had dozens of hyperlinks and theories about this country’s glorification of rugged individualism (i.e., willful ignorance and toxic masculinity), the impact of our inability to apologize/make amends for slavery or genocide, and the Republican agenda of defunding education after the Vietnam War.

But I’m gonna spare you all that. Since this country is so enamored of someone who “tells it like it is,”* here’s me, telling it like it really is.

If you’re well-off and you voted for Trump, you’re a selfish asshole. You got yours. You have no empathy and do not care about women dying, the planet becoming unlivable, or Putin annexing Europe. Your money and privilege are, after all, so much more important than mere people.

If you’re middle class and you voted for Trump, you can’t math. Trump plans on more tax cuts for corporations and the wealthy, plus tariffs to destroy the strong economy President Biden painstaking rebuilt from the LAST inept Trump administration.

If you are a white woman who voted for Trump, congrats to you, you good little foot soldier for the white supremacist patriarchy. Welcome to the Republic of Gilead. Kiss your birth control, bodily autonomy, and other rights goodbye, sweetie, especially if you live in a red state. At least that red robe matches the blood on your hands real nice.

And if you’re a naturalized or first generation Trump voter who isn’t a white, male billionaire? You think you’re “one of the good ones,” and are utterly unprepared to be rounded up and deported. Too bad the ICE goons are coming for you no matter how many MAGA hats you wear.

Oh, and if you’re Christian and voted for Trump? No, you’re not. You’re not about feeding the hungry, welcoming the stranger, and loving your neighbor. You’re a Christo-fascist (and Old Testament, at best).

And when any of you Trumpers land in the hole you dug by voting for that vile, fascist monster?

I’m gonna be the first to toss in a shovel full of dirt and say, “We fucking told you so.”

“TWICE.”

 

*Yes, I know Trump doesn’t actually tell it like it is. He just lies.